He examined the
fungus he found
In the
Brazilian rainforest
Researched it
Again and again
Consulted with
other botanists
And fungi
experts
From around the
world
Until he was
convinced
As were they
That no one had
ever found
One like it
before
He had
discovered
A new form of
life
A feeling overtook
him
Like none he
had ever felt before
All his years
of hard work
All the years
of education
Years of living
on ramen noodles
And cheap beer
Had all been
building
Towards this moment
Of colossal
discovery
Technically
A student had
found it
But since he
was in charge
Of the field
study
He rightfully
gets to take the credit
After all
The student
wouldn’t even have been there
Without his
knowledge
Guidance and
leadership
Finally he
could tell his friend
The nationally
renowned geologist
That he had
discovered something
And this wasn’t
just another rock
Leftover
From some
Mesozoic era
No one cares
about
This was a
fungus
A find of such
immense importance
Guaranteed to
make front page headlines
In the most
prestigious mycology journals
Around the world
After he
returned to the university
He laid awake
nights
Not able to
sleep
He didn’t even
notice
The hot chicks
on campus
Sunbathing
outside their dorms
Like he used to
on his way to class
What shall I
call it he wondered?
The burden of
naming the fungus
Preoccupied him
to such an extent
He decided to
ask for a sabbatical
He needed more
time
To think it
over
To come to the
right decision
He knew that
naming the fungus
Was the most
important
Decision of his
life
A decision that
would occupy
A place in botanical
history
He would be
judged
By the name he
chose
The
responsibility
Was too much to
bear
His nerves were
wearing thin
He could no
longer
Hit the
squirrels he shot at
Through his
living room window
Up until he had
discovered the fungus
That changed
his life immeasurably
More than he
ever
Could have
imagined
His only great
find
Had been an
arrowhead
He found buried
in a river bank
When he was a
boy in Iowa
Technically
It was his dog
That found it
But since he
was the dog’s owner
And master
He assumed full
ownership
Of the
arrowhead
However, when
his dog
Had pointed
exceptionally well
Exceeding
His wildest expectations
He would
sometimes
Scratch the dog
behind the ears
With the
arrowhead as a reward
One morning on
his way home
From purchasing
squirrel bait
And fresh
shotgun shells
Shortly before
He was due to
return
From his
sabbatical
The name came
to him at last
As he turned
onto a gravel road
He would name
the fungus
After himself
It was the
right thing to do
After all
He was the one
Who discovered
it
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